skills from 4
distinguish
why the coach to distinguish? Distinguish between what? How to distinguish?
distinction aimed at increasing self-insight by coach by coach to see more options and possibilities to support the coach who Qianshan mentality. distinguish
the facts and assumptions
of so-called assumption, our beliefs and values, that is, our hearts presumption fact occur, it comes from the reflection of our past experiences.
analogy,
supra shoes, when you see a man holding a cup, you know he want to go? the
In many cases, also did not wait for others you're the first to answer. Experience will tell you, is likely to pick up he was holding a glass of water, brush your teeth, to water the flowers. However, the real answer is what? Possible he took the cup with nothing dry.
this is the facts and assumptions in mind the difference.
a manager of the company, the difficulties encountered in the business. In order to overcome adversity, he looking for another boss cooperation. However, before he and the boss is when dealing with people as if his business less interested in, nor how he looked down on.
coach listening to the description of the manager, coaches, he said: also talk about the things behind?
Obviously, in many cases, we are being intimidated People often give their own do assume that: I do well how to do? Do not succeed lose face, right? It looks awful thing to be
this inherent fear, hinder a person's potential. The coach is to help you out of the inner potential to hinder reduced to a minimum. The so-called facts of
distinguish between facts and truth
not equal to the truth, because we know all the facts are often formed through our subjective experience, so the world and there is no absolutely true. We consider some of the things of the fact that, in fact, our own beliefs.
the beginning of this article referred to that case: a chapter Miss
, especially do not like the same office of a Mr., usually to avoid cooperation with him always, even at short to find his phone said others do not get later point in the Office of interpersonal discord, a serious impact on job performance. Miss
chapter of the superior Wu always a coach. When the tread that chapter Miss, they and Miss Zhang With such a dialogue. Zong
: you will not think I was wrong? not I work with? something not right? you can not like durian, you can even do not like to eat durian, but does not prevent you from working with him. a lot of things.
Zong said:
girls often smiled and said the truth?
distinction between the concept of misunderstanding,:
example: one, trust and the credit
coach: how much you trust a man?
Miss Wang: Many.
coach: you would marry each of them?
Miss Wang: Of course not.
Coach: So, you trust a person, it does not mean you do something, it does not mean you have to lend him money, right?
two true win-win situation and false win-win
students asked the coach: I have a wife, a good girlfriend, I think the best of both worlds. Can you tell me how can be a win-win situation?
Coach: What is the relationship with win-win situation?
students: I would like to have.
Coach: But have you ever asked these two women they do not want to? I know you would like both of them have, but you did not ask the two women want to let you two have?
students: of course, do not agree with Luo.
coach: so that only you win they lose Lo, how will win it?
often the concept of , which still comes from the belief, among the facts and the truth is not clear.
dear friend, you can try to distinguish between the following a few key words?
price and value
, dedication and aggressive
Qianshan to change
coach and consultant
coaches and to teach
knowledge and skills, skill
trust and faith
, Here is the speech of the period of contemporary Indian spiritual teacher Krishnamurti, may allow us to learn what makes a? The words we seem to take for granted, usually they are not really This provides us with a lot of learning. the true meaning of
love What is love? word has long been tarnished by the world. Everyone is talking about love, a magazine, newspaper and missionaries kept talking love. I love my country, I love my monarch, I love these books,
www.mercurialvaporu2012.com, I love the mountain, I love that kind of pleasure, I love my wife, I love God ... love is just a concept? If so, of course you can train it to grow it, cherish it, play with it, and want to distort it.
you say you love God, then what does that mean? But yes you love your own imagined the projected image fills you in accordance with the eyes of the sacred and noble appearance, for their own to put on a respectable coat, and the formation of that image. The so-called
We do not know how to deal with the love of the earth, so we hid in the abstract world of ideas. Perhaps love really is human suffering and the plight of the final answer, then how do we find out the true meaning of love? Only define you? A definition of religion to it, the society has its own definition, all kinds of bias and misinterpretations abound. Is worship a person, sharing a bed with someone and exchange feelings, company Xie noted, is the so-called love you? This extremely narrow, purely personal preferences, as well as resorting to the feeling of love, has become a recognized model in the community.
so religious to come forward to claim that love is beyond all this. They see in the world love is pleasure, competition, jealousy, possession, always want to control and interfere with each other's thoughts, and understanding of this complex phenomenon, they claim that, sure there were a sacred, beautiful and pure dye love is.
regardless of which corner of the earth, the so-called saints will tell you: watch a woman is a very bad thing. They would say: Abstinence is like closed his eyes, cuts off his own tongue, because to deny the beauty of the earth. Them so that my mind and meaning in hunger, they are off the water, human, and they abandoned the United States, the United States and women are inseparable.
love there is no sacred and secular points? Or humanity and divinity of points? Or simply only love it? Love whether only dedicated to a person unable to common facilities all? If I say Love is purely personal, or impersonal? Moral or immoral? Family or the family? If you fraternity of all human beings,
www.doudounemonclersquincy.com, you can fall in love with a single individual? Love is not emotional? Love is not an emotion? Love is not pleasure and desire? The above problems, errors shows that our understanding of love is often limited to the concept of should or should not, and subject to our cultural development mode.
If you want depth, Often divided for and should not, it is the most self-deceiving attitude to life.
so, how can we call it the flame of love? here refers to its own meaning, rather than its expression. First, I will refuse to church, community, parents, friends, any person or any books for my answer. I want to discover the truth of it. Humanity's greatest problem is that we are already countless types of different definitions, my own personality preferences but also because the current from being trapped in a pattern, therefore, in order to understand it, I should not put its own inclinations and prejudices freed ?
me since it has been found also confused division, are still subject to the manipulation of desire, I should have said to himself: It is what. That is love?
Love is a species of desire? do not deny that! For most of us, it really is a mixed pleasure and desire, that kind of pleasure is breeding by sensory, sexual needs and sexual satisfaction. I am not against sex, I just want to face up to its content. Sex can make you completely forget self in the moment of climax, but soon you fall back to the original confusion, so you will be eager to repeat that there is no worry, no problem, there is no realm of the self.
you say you love your wife, that love in fact contains sexual pleasure for you to cook with children pleasure. You rely on her, she dedicated to her body, emotions and encourage the sense of security and happiness of the class. Nothing lasts forever, and she was tired, she ran with the others, she abandoned you, destroy your whole emotional balance,
casque dr dre, you can not stand such a change, so give birth to the so-called envy, mixed with anxiety, hatred and violence. Thus, your love, but as long as you belong to me, I love you Otherwise, I hate you. I can rely on you to satisfy my sexual desire or other needs, I love you. Once you can not meet my needs, I do not like you. the dispute, then perhaps (just perhaps only), you will begin to understand what love is, then, and you can have complete freedom, but if you want to rely on her to bring you any joy, you will become her a slave, so if a person can truly love, is bound to have the freedom, it is not looted by the other side, but naturally from the heart Health. the
this subordination of others, the psychological state dependent on others for nourishment, often bring anxiety, fear, jealousy and guilt, as long as there is fear, there can be no love. tortured heart was sad, we'll never experience love. sentimental and love do not have any relationship, the same love and pleasure, the desire to also side has nothing to do.
love is not a product of the idea, because the idea is to belong to the past,
supra, it is impossible to breed out of love Love is unfettered, can not be caught in jealousy, because jealousy of the past, while but love will always belong to the living, it is not no respectable or not respectable.
Do you know the love a person, what does that mean? you can understand that there is no hatred, no jealousy, no anger, non-interference in each other's thoughts and behavior, neither condemn not compare the realm? If you heart, all intended, the body and entire life to love a person, you will have to compare you? when you have to love completely abandon their own, no longer the object of comparison .
Love contains the obligations and responsibilities? it needs to use these words? If you responsibility to do something, that there is love? responsibility under absolutely no love. humanity into a responsibility structure has been destroyed, because responsibility for the sake if you have to do something, you can not love what you do love wherever he went, are neither responsible, nor obligation at all.
Unfortunately, most parents think they have the responsibility for their children, so they tell the children what to do, what not to do, should be turned into what kind of person should not become what kind of person parents always hope their children will have secure jobs in the community, so they called the responsibility, but is passed to the child generation worship status and face nothing more. chase status and face, it destroyed the natural balance and order. of concern to parents, and often is how to create another round after round of the souls they help children adapt to society, they are really in fueling conflict, violence and war of the world, you can call it love and care?
......
skills from 2
coach's biggest weapons, called to listen, ask questions, distinguish and respond to.
1. Listening - to understand his goals and the present position from each other's narrative.
2. Ask questions - to help each other by asking questions to tap the self-blind spot and found his potential lies.
3. Distinguish between - the other side more clearly: what behavior is useful for their own goals, which belong to the
4. Response - to play the role of reflection in a mirror, in a timely manner pointed out that the existence of the other problems.
listen to
why coaches need to listen? Listen to what? How to listen?
with the coach saying, listen to get a response in order to obtain information, know the truth, and then targeted to respond.
have a chapter, Miss, do not particularly like the same office of a President had always avoid to cooperate with him, even received a phone looking for him to say that others are not, get the office was the occasion of one o'clock disharmony, seriously affecting work performance. superior of the
Chapter
Miss Wu is always a coach. When the tread that chapter Miss, they and Miss Zhang With such a dialogue. Zong
: do not think I was wrong? The You do not like durian, you can even do not like to eat durian, but does not prevent you from working with him! You will try to understand each other's uniqueness? To When husband Room waiter Li Ao to introduce Yakuyama Master,
Yakuyama engrossed in reading, Patty Lee, IV does not ignore.
Li Ao personality impatient, they murmured complained: see I, only to find that he did not like the legendary, and I think it Daoxing. each other, but like Ms. Zhang, as long as her Mr. an over in a word, she'll be in my mind out of the opposing point of view: listen, you will form will never be able to see, unable to break the blind spot, then stubbornly on the weakness of human nature.
In general, coaches in the process of coaching others need to listen to is:
each other's words:
the content of his speech was enough clear?
clear or vague? the
is what kind of tone, firm, and certainly I am weak? body language
:
his speech, facial expressions?
what posture?
his mind and body are you?
at the moment, he is relaxed the?
acts before he speaks, he is what? and behavior change?
each other's beliefs: What are the positive belief is
behind his words? open-ended questions, the 5W1H the questions:
what (which) the:
example,
franklin marshall, what you want? such as
Who
do it,
casque beats, or can not decided who the?
when
, what can be done?
the where,:
such as where could be better?
such Why
, why you want this result?
the how
such as, how can you achieve this?
As a coach, you need to clearly know what each problem is to ask. selectivity of the problem of
role is to guide,
moncler, to open its openness;
leading questions are often known as restrictive, and it lead you to discover that the answers you want. So your choice is only a guide;
open and restrictive, it do not care about you is what choice do the answers need to broaden their thinking, and not rigidly adhere to existing tangible answers to see more possibilities hidden in the back of the problem.
question the direction of the problem:
order to gather information;
order to clear objectives; to
for inspiration to guide;
order to motivate each other;
to challenge each other;
four
skills from 3
respond
coach why respond? Response to what? How to respond?
all the time to accept the response from the outside world because of the limited self-attention, and therefore ignored many outsiders response. This leads us to look at things the blind spot.
respond not just say it, respond to a variety of forms.
response can be an emotional and feeling; the
response can be an act;
response can be a state;
respond may be language can be silent;
response can not seem to respond to respond to;
response can lead to resistance, can also cause you to learn, depending on your listening;
response to what, by your own definition;
of NLP is said, there is no failure, only to respond to. role of
coach is to guide coaches who listen to the response value and significance. Response is a very important tool in the coach.
response formality effective to ask questions of the right course is a response, silent and given to the coach who think space is a response to the beatings of Chinese Zen masters to disciples wake-up call it not a response?
So, What is the key of the response? Use the words of the coach is the coach to respond to a heart - and his focus. When you are angry when the heart is good, there is no self, helping coach who my target, it may present the best response.
each respond to the signal of your learning.
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